SkibbCon 2.0

Anyone surprised by the fact I'm writing a tournament report so soon after my Gaelcon (well in Eoin terms it's soon) will be relieved to hear that I haven't gone mad, this one is about a tournament held nearly a whole year ago. SkibbCon 2 followed on from the fine tradition of SkibbCon in many ways. It was still situated in Russagh Mill, it still had an emphasis on having fun and most importantly drinking. However, some changes were made, mainly to facilitate more people being able to come. As such SkibbCon 2.0, held from the 10th to 12th of June 2011, was a Warhammer 40,000 doubles tournament with no more than 1000pts being spent by each team member using a standard Force Org chart(remember that part as it comes up later on). The only other restriction was that both the armies on a team must be similarly aligned to the Forces of Order or Disorder.

Armies of Order: All Imperial Space Marines. Imperial Guard. Eldar. Tau and Kroot Mercenaries. Witchhunters.

Armies of Disorder: Chaos Space Marines. Daemons. Orks. Dark Eldar. Tyranids. Necron.

I found that Orks being a Force of Disorder to be a bit harsh.

18 teams were signed up as of Friday night from all over the place. We had a large contingent down from The Town as well as some people I didn't know from Limerick. After much "socializing"(please note that in this article this means heavy drinking) it was time for the table quiz. After having through the shame of last year's mix up with the team names, things were a lot more organised. Now there is no age filter on this site so I can't go into detail about a lot of the team names but apparently Caolán likes to suck balls of many different types and in great volume. The majority of the team names were a testament to this. The quiz was tense where cheating and blackmail were rife and a threat of physical bodily harm was doled out to Andrew Kirwan, who was not in attendance, by SWG president Cian. In the end it was the aforementioned ball-sucker's team who won and netted themselves a nice bottle of alcohol. I suppose we could have given something more sensible as a prize but shut up.

It's okay, Merv wasn't there so it was safe.

After the quiz it was time for another SkibbCon tradition, drunk poker. It was impressive to see that even though Jason "REALLY likes Stephen Fry" Lane was playing poker he could also play another game that I think is called "Hey! You look like you're winning poker, have some absinthe". It should be noted that even though he was playing that game he still managed to drink an unholy amount of the stuff himself. Much merriment was had including ringing Dave "Crap at 40k" Coleman at 3 in the morning to shout at him. My night ended when at half 5 I was told I should go to bed as I was too drunk and had to organise things in the morning.

I'm sorry. I'm sure it won't happen again................

So in the morning I awoke, begrudgingly, to find some nice breakfast and some new attendees who had driven down from Dublin and Limerick. After hating them for not having hangovers it was time to begin a marathon of 40k.It continued for many, many hours but hey, we were eating and sleeping in the same place so there was no need to hurry. Not that anyone tried. Because I wasn't playing this next part are just going to be a selection of photographs and abusive comments.

Gribble gribble

1 Grey Knight model versus most of a Tyranid Army

Here we see Ivan's Vindicare Assassin about to be charged by a large part of Derek Barry's Tyranid army. Unsurprisingly, the Grey Knight won out, proving even more that Ivan only plays crutch armies. Also, that lack of a paint job by Ivan cost his team a podium finish.

I can't look at this any other way than John whispering to his models.

After spending so long talking on the internet and on podcasts about how much he wanted to attend SkibbCon we see John "Doesn't drink his whiskey" Stowe playing the fluffy and fun Deathclut in Landraider spam with Long Fang spam combo.

All Infanty Guard

If you look closely at this picture you can see a finger pointing at the infantry in David Chamber's famous infantry guard list. HINT: They're in the tanks.

Mt. Long Fang

Here we have 36 long fangs on a single terrain piece. This army belongs to the Double Space Wolf combo of Chris and Ulick. That is a seriously undercosted ruined building.

Mt Fire Warrior

Yes, that is the same building. This time full of Pa's Firewarriors. I'm going to go right ahead and say that's not as point efficient as the Long Fang one.

Taking Neck Beard to a new level

Ah my nemesis. Alec "The Gypsy" Cornelius picture here with former SkibbCon winner Tristram "Just back from a wedding" Hills.

I'm glad this thing has a flash

In the absence of solar pulses we had to have a way of introducing Night fighting in a non Dawn of War mission. Solution: Still be playing games at half 11 at night. All thanks to Bruce "Not playing Tau this time" Sutton's apparently invincible Land Speeder.

WTF are these things?

Pictured are, I think, Kevin's Eldar. They were partnered to the invic-land speeder having marines. I just don't have any idea what those models are meant to represent. Proixied Fire Dragons? That's probably it.

So after the day's games wrapped up, around half eleven it was time for the serious drinking to take place. However, before this could begin there was a slight problem. It turns out there was a problem with one teams list. Now this team will remain nameless but it seems like Dan Ahern and Pat Corr thought they were playing in a 2004pt doubles tournament. Now as I was trying to come up with an amicable solution to this predicament I had Dan constantly repeating this one sentence to me: "Shut up, give us 0 points and drink this." So I did.

Many hilarious things happened. One of my favourites was when I dumped a bucket of ice water on Chris and Tadhg. It was totally worth having to go outside in the rain, to get a mop and clean it up. We rang Dave again, ha suck it, Dave. Red or Black was also played. I still maintain it's the most taxing of drinking games. Damn you, Alec. And to a lesser extent damn you too, Stowe. My girlfriend had to carry a hammered drunk, sorry, food poisoned Tristram up a flight of stairs as he tried to requisition my room. I would have helped her but, ....... yeah.

Yeah.

So I think I got to bed. I'm not sure. I don't remember waking up. I spent the entire next day hammered. Walking around, being unhelpful and shouting for no reason. Again I wasn't playing so here are more pictures.

Alec: "What do you think we should do here, Tris?"

Tris: "I'll catch them off guard by pretending to be asleep then you roll dice at them until they die"

Here are some pictures of Alec and Tristram playing "Best Army" Winners Darran and Bob. Team Town were thrown in at the deep-end here after finding themselves in 3rd position after being gifted 20 points by the generous Team Cheating. Turns out Wraithlords don't like massive amounts of venoms. Who knew?

SWG's president Cian hoping using an actual battery will help keep his Battlewagon going

Can it see us? Oh balls.

So because we felt bad for Team Cheater we decided to give Dan and Pat a very special gift. SWG member Sylvan had made some absolutely amazing seals for us to give as prizes and we could think of no better recipients of these impurity seals than these guys.

Dan is the smuggest man in the world.

So that was it really, or as much as I can coherently remember. I'm really looking forward to the event this year and finally getting to play in a doubles game. I want to thank everyone who came down to our convention. I want to congratulate all of those who won prizes:

1st place - Dyslexia Untied - Richard Flood + Pádraic Ó Confhaola
2nd place - The Kabal of the Bunny Run - Tristram Hills + Alec Corneilius

3rd place - Earth on Hell - John Stowe + Ralph Risk

Best Army - Awesome Raptor - Robert Brennan + Darren Kerwick

Wooden Spoon - Off at Stephen Fry - Jason Lane + Pat Bourke

I also want to thank Craig for his invaluable help with admin. The SWGers: Caolán, Chris, Cian, Emma, Pa, Sylvan and Tadhg for their invaluable help with everything else. You guys are a great bunch of people to cater for and here's to many more SkibbCons. I'll just leave you with one thought....

Top Gun.